My husband, Andrew, retired soon after we sold our business. We live in Melbourne, Australia, but now we spend a lot of time traveling.
On the other hand, our four children are working hard – the youngest is still at university, but he does a part-time job. Aged 20 to 28, these two have mortgages and all the costs that come with owning a property. Being young and needy is a life stage that builds character, but, as parents, we want to be able to help our children sometimes.
Andrew and I had been planning a family trip to celebrate our 60th birthdays for several years, but last year, a light bulb went on, and we thought, “Why not?” Why don’t we wait? Let’s go now.”
We gave each child enough money for their airfare to pay for a trip to Europe. We also offered to pay for accommodation in Puglia, food and car hire. This suggestion was extended to the children’s partners, too. They all bit our hands.
We had a lot of fun traveling together
Ten months later, we all gathered in Puglia. We rented a villa with a pool near Alberobello and Martina Franca. We rented two normal size cars instead of a big van (very difficult on narrow roads). We would visit the city early in the morning and sunbathe by the pool most afternoons.
We spent a wonderful day together at the Beach Board, Lido Gandoli. One day, we went swimming at Monopoli beach. We took two long drives to Matera and Lecce, and were both rewarded for our efforts with amazing architecture and history.
We had a leisurely lunch at local restaurants. By arriving at the restaurants when they opened for lunch, we never had a problem finding a table large enough for all of us.
We ate breakfast and dinner at our rental, which meant going to a supermarket but saved us money and allowed us to try local produce.
Breakfast was to serve yourself and clean up after yourself, which worked. Dinner was done in turns, as was setting the table and cleaning. Dinner at home is made for a lot of comfort food. No one had to worry about what they drank or about driving home on the “wrong side” of the road on bad roads with no street lights. We had a great outdoor space, and we had slow dinners and chats. Sometimes, we played family quizzes.
Some nights, we would go inside after dinner and have a “family movie” night. One night, it was “Gladiator.” Most of us had seen it, but it was great to watch it together in Italy.
We laughed, we ate, we drank, we played games, we swam – it was divine.
It wasn’t perfect, but it was totally worth it
It was good to go with our older children – or Kiddults as we sometimes mock them. As advertising goes, it was very valuable.
Was it perfect? No. But families are not perfect, and every relationship involves compromise.
For Andrew and I, sharing adult time with our children and their spouses without the distraction of work and rushing around was wonderful. It won’t be long before another generation joins our family (we can’t wait to be grandparents!), but babies will change everything . Andrew and I really appreciated this time as a group of adults.
It was also great to see our older children interacting with their siblings and their partners. All you want as a parent is happy, healthy children, and seeing them all happy and healthy in the Italian sun was a joy beyond words.
Two children are now back home in Melbourne, one coming home next week and the other at the end of August. When we’re all back in Melbourne, we’ll make pasta and reminisce about our wonderful Puglian holiday. Then we all had gastro!
Our relationship as a family is stronger 🙂 There is no price to pay for that.
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